Almost September...

This summer has been so full! We spent (what seemed like) every waking moment at the water park, got great tans, and just stayed super busy. Now, we're talking about back to school clothes, picking out a new lunch box, and it's just hard to believe it's already time to get back into the fall routine. Ever since last year, September has been a dreaded month for me.

James left last June for California, and came home for one week of family time the first week of September, before leaving for Iraq. We took Kennedie to her first day of "school" and headed straight to the airport from there. I will never, ever forget the knot in my stomach that day. I will never, ever forget the helpless feeling I had when I had to finally let go of my husband outside of that airport, and drive home. Alone. Knowing where he was going. He flew to Iraq a few days later...on September 11th.

The past year has been so full of so many things. I had no idea what it would be like to try to fall asleep every night, with my husband half way across the world, seeing and doing his "hero work," as Kennedie said. I had no idea what it would be like to take care of my then 5 month old baby and 3 1/2 year old daughter and wonder if I was doing a good job. We said prayers for Daddy every night, sometimes in the car if we were sad and wanted some peace about everything. Kennedie, in that 3 1/2 year old brilliant brain of hers, knew that I needed to hear daily Daddy stories. She loved telling me all about her "Daddy polar bear" and how they would crawl around the house together, pretending to be polar bears, and her Daddy would let her "hide" under her to stay warm. Her Granny even took her to Build a Bear and she picked out a polar bear, named it "Daddy" and dressed it in Marine blues!

What's most surprised me though, is how differently people responded. I have such an amazing support group around me. I have an amazing family and close group of friends, who without, I would not have made it through. There were days, I would have to be coaxed out of the house, out of jammies, and almost scraped up off the floor. Without these amazing people, I could not have been the Mommy I needed to be. Then there's the people who simply chose to disappear from my life. People who I thought were friends. Good friends. People who I thought I could call for anything. People who I still to this day have not heard from. I hope and pray that if I ever know someone who was in need, that I would be a true friend to them.
Needless to say, this past year has been a trying one. I would not want to do it over again, but I do feel thankful for having gone through it. I know that I am stronger for having lived it. I see the beautiful, smiling faces on my precious children and know that I am doing a good job. My amazing husband is now home, safe, where he belongs. And Kennedie still, tells everyone she meets, that her Daddy is a hero...and he is. And this September will be better!